I just had another confidence surge today.

I was dead until like 4pm today.

Yesterday, I didn’t get much sleep, and the day before I was only able to sleep one hour after trying to do my math homework.  Today, I had four tests, English, Algebra II, AP World History, and Latin and right after lunch I started to feel dead.  After lunch my English and Latin test, I didn’t even try doing anymore.  My brain was already dead.  Yes, of coooourse I failed everything again and of coooourse I didn’t study for anything at all after I was like online eye-shopping the whole day yesterday until 11:00pm and then I just slept.  Ugh, before 4pm I was like, I give up on everything but then a few minutes later, I was like nahh I WILL NOT FAIL ANYMORE.  I shall get 100s from now on.

I’m such an O.  Who’s always late every single day; I was just born like that.  (I’m sorry Mr. Martinez,  I will come early every single day from now on.)  Also, Os fail a lot, just like me.  LOL they fail and then fail again and then fail and then epic fail and then fail.  Especially last year, I was such a fail.  I did nothing at all last year, not even my homework I used to do so diligently before.  I used to do all my homework at least, even though I never studied.  Even after this new semester started, I’m still pretty much the same.  I used to be really neat with organizing my notes but I started to slack off since last year too.  All my papers are just mixed up with different subjects and I am soooo freaking adgfadgalksdjf;lkadf messy! >:(  Oh and also, I got so fat and jiggly too.  I can’t even look at myself anymore because it’s so ew.

After 4pm, I just had this confidence surge again just like what Os are supposed to be like.  Harharhar, I’m so confident about everything.  Even though I failed everything I’m so happy.  All of a sudden I felt like I was living again.  My heart felt so calm and I felt so excited to start from the beginning again.  I made out all these plans for myself and everything.  LOL and I walked while memorizing katakana just before.  Yes, such a big improvement.  I used to walk everyday but these days I haven’t been exercising at all.  I shall start exercising every day again.  & I said it was the “new beginning” for me so many times already, but this is really the last time I’ll say that.  Jigeum buhtuh jungmaljungmal jinjjajinjja I will.  I’m not going to fall behind anymore.  I’m not going to fail anymore because I am me.

Before my sixteenth birthday, I just have two goals.
1) read off my fines at the library (I can’t read off fines anymore after my birthday T_T)
2) organize my life, my room, my notes, my everything

AND, my daily things to do that I will make sure I do from 16 and on…
+ exercise
Uhhh I can’t think of anything else besides exercise right now. LOOOL but anyways, yeah. Exercise<3

Alright, yo voy a hacer mi tarea ahora.
Did that make sense? Ugh I’m so behind in every subject and I have so much to catch up on.  I will study diligently from now on and be organized and do well.  I prooomise not to be late anymore Senor Martinez, so stop yelling at me.


About siabyul

loves XIA Junsu / designer / photographer

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